Incorrect: I am playing with Bob at the park today.
Correct: Bob and I play at the park.
Explanation: The first one is wordy because if you eliminate the to be verb: “playing," it drags out the action. In the second sentence we rearranged some words and took out “playing” and replaced it with "play" to make it more concise.
Example 2
Incorrect: The hungry shark is hunting the juicy fish for dinner.
Correct: The shark hunts the fish.
Explanation: The first sentence has a lot of adjectives that take away from the action and main point of the sentence. The second sentence conveys the same message but in a more concise way.
Incorrect: Jack is kicking the ball with Jenna.
Correct: Jack kicks the ball with Jenna.
Explanation: The first sentence is wordy because if you eliminate to be verbs, like “is kicking," it strengthens the sentence. In the second sentence we took out the to be verb and rewrote it as kicks.
